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Browsing All Posts published on »March, 2011«
Honey, come here and sniff this. Does it smell like it’s gone bullsh!t to you?
A friend confessed the other day to being a sniffer. She’s a waitress and she can’t pull anything out of the fridge without sniffing it. It’s the first sign that it’s gone south, if it smells bad. The first sniff is your first impression of a food. The smell lingers in the back the throat […]
Only 2 grams of All-Natural, Whole Grain, Hormone-Free, Deception per Serving!
March 24, 2011
I have taken many a college course over the years in my fruitless efforts to acquire graduate degrees in a variety of disparate subjects. A doctor told me once that this insatiable curiosity and boundless energy (as I like to think of it) is commonly called ADHD. Sure, okay, you say “potato,” I say “Hey! […]
Those aren’t maggots.
March 20, 2011
I know it seems unrelated, but when I think of Chinese Medicine I always think of this. How could a billion Chinese people be wrong? Right? Maybe? I dunno, actually. I easily dismiss a lot of alternative medicine bullshit and bad science. I think Chinese medicine is different though. I can’t get it out of […]
Sitting on her Tuffet Sorting her Curds from Whey
March 18, 2011
I’m pleased to report I haven’t yet killed my kefir grains. In fact they are developing beautifully. With my grains, in 24 hours, I can generate about as much kefir as we drink/use in one day. Perfect. I have pulled some grains out, because there were too many and they began to sour the milk […]
Those Lucky Charms Are Only Irish If They’re Swimming In Jameson
March 17, 2011
Last year my then Kindergartner piled into the car at noon wearing a shiny green strand of Mardi Gras beads. “I learned about the Irishes,” he said. He lifted his right hand and shook a snack size zippy baggie of Lucky Charms. “What,” I said, knowing already what the magically delicious treat in his hand […]
3.141592653589793238462643383279502884
March 15, 2011
If I was really on it, I would have posted this yesterday on pi day, March 14. I seem to be running just about a day tardy on theme posts. Pie is my all-time favorite food. I have been known to eat an entire pie myself, ask my husband. But I NEVER order it in […]
I gave it up for lint.
March 13, 2011
Spring turns everything upside down with strange behavior. The birds and squirrels in the backyard are frisky. Human behavior changes too, I start scrubbing things with a toothbrush and saving the lint from my dryer and sprinkling it around my yard so the birds can have fluffy well insulated nests. I have noticed that in […]
Fingernails for breakfast
March 11, 2011
I have been accused on more than one occasion of being a little too negative and cynical. Maybe. Sometimes if I think too hard about what I eat or my carbon footprint I end up with nothing to do but sit and chew my fingernails. It’s not just me though. That icon of quirky poetry, […]
Fat Tuesday, Bloated Wednesday
March 9, 2011
True existence is what appears to an ordinary, untrained consciousness. But when it comes under logical scrutiny, true existence cannot be found. Even in our everyday life we often find contradictions between the way certain things appear and their actual mode of existence; that is, the way things actually exist is different from the way […]
Lasagna for Smelly Mel
March 7, 2011
I promised a girlfriend a copy of my vegetarian lasagna recipe. Since I have dispensed with the paper recipe card many years ago, I will have to type it out, so it seemed like a good time to share. I am not real good about using recipes, I am a make it up sorta girl. […]
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I'm gonna be somebody.
Fats Domino
March 28, 2011
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